There are people out there whose appearance doesn’t conform to society’s standards of beauty, who do not follow fashion trends, and who don’t want to reach excellence. But these people somehow manage to have that mysterious, almost magical appeal that captivates everyone around them.
We at Bright Side decided to find out why this is so and came across some very interesting scientific research by TIME magazine that explains what actually draws us to each other. Surprisingly, it has nothing to do with physical attractiveness.
The answer is quite straightforward: the most important thing that makes you attractive in the eyes of others is your emotions. This might sound obvious, but it’s not that simple. Just expressing your emotions is not enough — your feelings should be sincere and, most importantly, simple. We are attracted to those people whose emotions we can easily understand, and appearance isn’t very important here.
We unconsciously look for a mate who embodies similar thoughts and ethics as we do, and when we find a person like that we subconsciously begin to feel attracted to him or her.
These findings came as a result of an experiment conducted by Silke Anders, a professor of Social and Affective Neuroscience at the University of Lübeck (Germany). She had a group of volunteers watch video clips of women who facially expressed fear or sadness.
After watching the videos, the people in the study were asked to rate what they saw. It was found that the better the volunteers understood how a woman on the screen was feeling, the more attracted they were to her, regardless of her physical looks.
The researchers also measured the people’s brain activity during the experiment. As it turned out, the area of the brain dealing with our attraction to another person showed increased activity when the participants of the experiment were the most certain about what emotions the women were experiencing.
In other words, our ability to easily decode and accept someone’s emotions makes us trust that person. We feel that we can find a common language with them, and that’s why we subconsciously feel attracted to them.